In this second instalment in our series on “pieces my readers should read,” I’m turning my attention to trust. If you’ve ever tried to function well in a low-trust environment, at work or at home, then you know how critical trust is to our optimal performance. It’s said that trust takes years to build and seconds to break—but here are some recent resources that might help accelerate that building process:
- In my book ELASTIC (2023), the T in that acronym stands for trust. One of my main conclusions from that research was that trust is built primarily by extending it rather than by earning it or expecting it. Sit with that for a moment.
- I enjoyed Adam Grant’s recent conversation with Alison Fragale about her book Likeable Badass. She argues that status is the pathway to power, not the other way around. What’s the link with trust? Status is about securing respect and admiration from others. This perception of being competent, reliable and influential builds trust, which in turn gives that person power, which is control over resources and decision-making. So, if you want more decision-making power, double down on what Grant describes as being “competent and caring.”
- That discussion got me thinking about the links between likeability (the L in ELASTIC) and trust. Likeability is not just about being “nice”—see Alicia Menendez’s The Likeability Trap for more on that—but sustainable likeability comes from demonstrating a base level of integrity and competence, combined with an orientation toward other people rather than primarily toward yourself. It’s a bit of a fraught concept, but shows up repeatedly as one of the most powerful contributors to having influence as a leader.
- Jon Levy builds on this work in You’re Invited. He suggests that trust is built through a combination of competence, honesty and benevolence. It erodes when those three things are absent, but not in equal measure. We are more likely to be able to forgive a breach in competence than in honesty, and we extend more grace in response to a breach in honesty than we do toward a lack of benevolence. This means that if we have a fundamental doubt that someone is operating from a starting point of goodwill and in fact does not have our best interest at heart, we are highly unlikely to trust them, regardless of their other behaviours. This isn’t too far from what Amy Edmondson taught us about psychological safety in teams…
The takeaways if you want to build trust on your team? People need to know that their colleagues are for them, that they are true to their word and that they are good at their jobs. Not quick to build, but shouldn’t take a lifetime either.